How to Deal with Difficult People

Do you have a difficult person in your life? Someone who gets under your skin every time you’re around them? Maybe that person lives under the same roof with you.

The prophet Jeremiah had a cast of imperfect people around him but he was delivering an unpopular message to Israel:  “Repent or your land will be under siege and you will be taken into captivity by the Babylonians.” Jeremiah was telling the truth, but no one wanted to hear it or believe it. They were stubborn and difficult. At one point, they imprisoned Jeremiah.  Another time they threw him into a cistern.  How’s that for friendship?  God speaks some hard truth to Jeremiah about his friends:  “Beware of your friends; do not trust anyone in your clan.
For every one of them is a deceiver, and every friend a slanderer.”  With friends like that, who needs enemies? 

It’s my experience that God does not allow our worlds to be perfect because if he did we’d never need him.  What did Jeremiah do during his season of frustration with his people? He spent time with God daily. Jeremiah hung on God’s every word so he’d know what to say to his people.  When you are dealing with a difficult person or group of people, do you seek the Lord for counsel? Do you consult God’s word for advice on how to handle the situation?

Jeremiah also lamented to God about those he was trying to reach. He asked in Jeremiah 12, Why does the way of the wicked prosper?  Why do all the faithless live at ease? Instead of complaining to other people, do you take your complaints about someone straight to God?  Throughout the Bible, God’s seemed to be OK when his people expressed their frustrations to him. He wants that kind of relationship with us.  He knows our thoughts anyway.  Why not verbalize them?

Jeremiah still loved the difficult people. In Jeremiah 4, the prophet’s feelings about his people come out:  Oh, my anguish, my anguish! I writhe in pain. Oh, the agony of my heart! My heart pounds within me, I cannot keep silent. For I have heard the sound of the trumpet;  I have heard the battle cry. Jeremiah didn’t want anything to happen to his people because he cared about them. How many of us love the difficult people in our lives?  Do you take the time to pray for them?  I remember a situation years ago where the person I worked with acted extremely jealous and would attempt to undermine me at times because of his insecurity. Instead of disliking him, I prayed for him and God gave me a different perspective on why he behaved the way he did.

Jeremiah is a case study on how to deal with difficult people. God wants us to seek his counsel first, then wants us to dole out his unconditional love to those who trouble us. He will provide the wisdom and the words to handle most any situation.