Losers, Keepers by Lara Ingram

Today’s Guest Blogger is Lara Ingram. Lara is a long-time friend and spiritual daughter. She is currently doing full-time Mom duty as the CEO at the Ingram house. She is devoted to growing in Christ to discover who she really is meant to be. Her former career was crisis communications and spokesperson for high-level Federal agencies in the Chicago, NYC and D.C. area.  Now any time outside the home is spent volunteering at church, women’s groups and conferences and learning through Bible Study. 

Losers, Keepers by Lara Ingram

“I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.” (John 10:10 MSG).

As I’ve matured as a Christian and dived deeper into Scripture, I have learned that we can hold God at His Word. He promises an abundant life and I want it! For years I desired the peace that transcends all understanding and peace in strife, joy, abundancy etc. but it wasn’t happening until now.

Let me share that the fastest, most effective way to start is to come out of isolation and be involved in a good solid Christian community. If you are not single, then marriage and motherhood will hold the BIGGEST mirror up to your soul.

Here began the work. God did the supernatural healing and change in me but He didn’t push. He waited for me to be ready. Matthew 10:39 says, “If you don’t go all the way with me, through thick and thin, you don’t deserve me. If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself. But if you forget about yourself and look to me, you’ll find both yourself and me.”

I had everything I thought I wanted, and yet was not content. I achieved career success, financial stability, a home; friends and family close by but not too close so as to remain comfortable. I had given up on marriage and kids at the time and told God I was content with that and would follow Him. At thirty-eight years old I said out loud, “There’s no way I can find someone, fall in love, get married and have a baby all by forty.”

God has a hilarious sense of humor that I adore. He led me very quickly into marriage and even quicker (like within a month of marriage) to being pregnant and no longer the lone wolf in the wild. My baby Isaac was due on my fortieth birthday.

And now, with another sweet babe on the way, I find it has been very uncomfortable. I left the career and let the husband be the breadwinner so that I could stay at home to care for our little bud. As any mom knows, it has been overwhelming and full of self-sacrifices. I have been able to see myself with a clear lens as there is no isolation or hidden things in marriage.

“Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and lay bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account” (Hebrews 12:13).

How I love, how I relate to my spouse, my child, how I view situations, and handle conflict all looks very different from how I viewed myself as a single woman.

The comfort and ease have been removed and now the real Lara has been revealed to show self-sufficiency, control, and dominance, a rebellious spirit not liking being under authority, a need to control to feel safe, anxiety and fear.

We just went through a very trying time in our marriage and I felt like I was losing everything, including myself. What I lost was my ability to control situations and other people. What I discovered was I was forced to be fully dependent on God Almighty. I felt very vulnerable and out of my element. Only He could help me through this and only if I remained faithful to his call to stay, and not run.

God means what he says. His powerful Word is sharp as a surgeon’s scalpel, cutting through everything, whether it’s doubt or defense, we are called to listen and obey. Nothing and no one is impervious to God’s Word. We can’t get away from it—no matter what. (Hebrews 4:12-13 MSG)

In losing my life I’ve found in God’s Kingdom losers are keepers, not weepers.

In losing my former life of self-sufficiency and keeping God and people at bay, I am now open to truly growing up in Christ and keeping the faith. Only now can I begin to grow closer to Him and be more like Him with the help of those around me. I have relinquished being in the driver seat Instead, I allow Him to be at the helm. He is worthy and more capable of holding that position than I am!

“You are my hiding place;
you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance” (Psalms 32:7)