It’s that time again. I had the pleasure of being an at-home mom again while both my daughters were home from college for most of the spring term and all of the summer. But now the door revolves and I am about to become an empty nester again. My oldest left last week to begin her final two years of her nursing program. She warned me that she probably won’t be back in the summer because she will be working. As I teared up she said, “Don’t cry mom, I will be home for the holidays and I’m only two hours away.”
I don’t think she grasps how my heart is aching as it takes in the fleeting moments of my life as her primary caregiver. Indeed, I know I will always be her mom, but those of us on this journey with the revolving door know that our job titles are changing and what was a full-time, or more appropriately described as “overtime” position is being diminished to consultant and financier.
This realization hit my heart even more so this time because my youngest daughter is off to her second year of college. The other day, I went to her room and inquired with frustration, “When are you going to start packing?” Her words pricked my heart with tears as she said calmly, “Don’t worry Mom. I am an adult. I got this.” My frustration mixed with my wounded heart as I detailed all that had to be done in the shrinking timeframe. But with a calm like I haven’t seen before she just listened to me rant and said she understands. By the end of my tirade, I was smiling at her so proud that she didn’t feed into the false emotions I was displaying (frustration and anger) but kept calm as I got teary because we both realized our days were numbered. I gave her a hug and told her how proud I was of her.
All the time we work to prepare our children for adulthood is not wasted. As my front door has continued to revolve with my daughter’s comings and goings, they have been taking in all that my husband and I have taught them and are becoming amazing adults.
I heard this statement and it stuck with me, especially during this time in my life. “Purpose of the light isn’t to light for itself but to provide light for others.”As parents that is what we are doing: lighting the path for our children. Giving them the grace to make mistakes. The freedom to make their own mark. A revolving door into our homes as they venture out into the world and home again until they are strong enough to stand on their own. 2 Corinthians 8:7: “But as you excel in everything—in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in all earnestness, and in our love for you—see that you excel in this act of grace also.”
Finally, we must remind our children that, no matter what, they have our unconditional hearts just as our Father does for us. Jeremiah 31:3 says, “The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying, I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have drawn with you lovingkindness.”
The door to my heart will never be closed even as the door to my home continues to revolve. I am looking forward to each time my beloveds come back so I can see how they have grown. My pride grows with them and my love deepens. This journey produces its own trials for us all, but I shall find joy.
Romans 5:3-5 says: “More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”
Where in life’s journey are you? Are you counting all the blessings? Can you see how the Lord is growing you and those around you? Can you feel the love of the Father as He carries you through the suffering? Need help seeing the blessings? Reach out to any of us here at Pearls of Promise Ministries. We would love to encourage you with the love of Jesus.